How to eat toilet paper

First, steal a big wad of toilet paper from
the roll in the bathroom.

 Find a comfortable place to consume your treat.
The bed is always a nice place.

Tear the toilet paper into small, edible

bits. Don't worry about what falls off

the bed.

Stuff as much as you can into your mouth.

It will become sticky once you get
your drool all over it. It may stick
to your teeth, use your tongue to
move it around.

Use an up and down motion consistently
to insure you make a nice paste of the
toilet paper.

Once your face resembles Elvis Presley,
you have acquired the grace and
style needed to consume toilet paper
at any social function.

Bon Appetit!

Just a Reminder

Summer is here and no dog should ever be left in a car - even with the windows down. Our Mum only lets us sit in the car with her. She says it is because she does not want us to overheat but I think it is because she doesn't want us to take the car out for a spin without her. For pete's sake, I would keep both paws on the wheel, it isn't as though I wouldn't pay attention. Maybe it is Cooper she is worried about.

Hide and Seek - Cooper Style

"If I can't see you, then you cannot see me." - Cooper

Old Dogs and Old Shoes

Old dogs, like old shoes, are comfortable.
They might be a bit out of shape
and a little worn around the edges,
but they fit well."

- Bonnie Wilcox 'Old Dogs, Old Friends'

How to Eat a Chewie - Lesson 1

Grasp the chewie firmly between your jaws.

Be confident, show the chewie you are in charge.

Determine which side of your mouth is your chewing side.

Move the chewie to that side of your mouth.

Clench down with an assertive snap.

Careful not to chew too deliberately so that the chewie

slips down your food hatch. This can provide an

opportunity for choking and tends to upset the parents.

Chew until the said chewie is completely soft and small in size.

Only swallow when the chewie has been determined to be

of small enough size to be consumed.

There is nothing quite so indelicate as throwing up one's chewie

on the living room rug. Chewies with rug bits are not on the menu.

Check the floor for any extra bits which may have fallen

away during the food exercise. Use your tongue to gather

any stray consumables which may have gone wandering.

Finish by having a water chaser to clean your palate.

Note to new chewier consumers: One chewie per day is appropriate. More than one per day may promote flatulence (gas) and bring tears to your parents' eyes, for all the wrong reason.

Let's Play Pig in a Blanket!

I'll be the "pig" and you roll me up in the blanket!

I'll just roll myself inside this quilt and then you won't be able to see me.

 Can you see me?

 Can you see even a little bit of me?

I see you!

(big yawn) But now I neeeddzz to sleeeeepzzz...

Cooper, do you want to play?

Hmmm, I guess not.

We're Baaaaccckk!

Mum left us for THREE WEEKS and went on a LOOONNG trip to England and France. And us? We got to go stay at the vet's kennel for THREE WEEKS. Mum wouldn't let us go to our usual haunt because I was limping and she thought enforced rest would help (it did). And Cooper came home so tired from our last play date at The Farm that Mum thought a quiet vacation would do him good (it did).

Mum took 1,200+ pictures and fortunately she is not going to make you look at all of them. But she did get some interesting shots (she is even doing a slide show of "Dogs and Doors" of all the dogs and doorways she took pictures of - what the...?)

This is a French dog pee'ing in the street. See, they pee just like girl dogs do here in the USA.

Yes, we know. Our mother is different.

And this is Mum at Monet's garden and house. (He did not invite her because he is actually dead.)

Not that anyone cares but Cooper and I are fine. I lost my voice (bark) because I barked so much at the vet's place. I am a bit hoarse but I will work my way back up to my usual decibels shortly.

Before Mum came home, she stayed with our grandparents in North Carolina. They got us a new cousin, "Sam". She is a bloodhound and Mum says she will get giganormous some day. She's got paws like large size waffles.

Sam is 10 weeks old and growing about an inch a day. Mum says Sam has the softest puppy fur this side of the Rockies. (But Mum says I have the softest Corgi fur anywhere).

So we are back and will have photos up shortly. Thanks for not breaking into the house while she was gone and taking all our toys and treats. Dad appreciates that too because he has his cowboy toys and no one gets to play with them except Dad.

Love, Dozer



Big Ahhhh Please

Gotta love corgis, just gotta!

~ Dozer

Anything done with friends...

Anything done with friends is bound to be fun!

~ Dozer

Butt Beautiful

I had a small butt once. But that was long ago.

~ Dozer

What the...?

And people think dogs aren't smart? Yeah right!

~ Dozer

Well of course!

It is a wonder that not everyone has a corgi, isn't it?

Say No More...

Created by the talented Caldwell Tanner

who can be found at www.Loldwell.com

Not much help...

Sunday is laundry day, clean the house day, pick up toys day. Apparently not everyone got the message.

I Think Not!

Mum's juvenile and totally inappropriate humor rose again when she was in PetSmart buying some needed supplies. she saw these diapers and thought they were hysterically funny, especially the one of the corgi.

I think not! How rude...and poor marketing if you ask me.

Apparently...

Mum says that apparently we have a very dead, very smelly, beached whale in our suburban backyard. She has come to this conclusion because Cooper rolled in something incredibly snarky before bed and arrived with a huge black, smelly, oil substance on his neck.

I am somewhat confused as we live an hour from the beach. And Cooper would not tell me where this delicious specimen is. And Mum is totally disgusted with both of us running around the backyard and coming in muddy and smelly. Not sure I see the problem in that.

So Cooper has been demoted from "King" and I am once again on the throne!

Love, Dozer

All Hail the King!

It's Good to be King

My royal bedroom

My royal pillow

It's good to be king

We are exhausted...

Mum got a bee in her bonnet after church that we should do some spring cleaning. "Whatever for?" I asked, the dog run is perfectly suited to be the catchall of the house. But Mum had ordered a dumpster and she filled it in an hour and while not completely finished, felt she had made progress. The she locked me (not Cooper, but me) in the house and cut the front and back lawns. Apparently because Cooper does not try to attack the lawn mower he can stay outside.

After she got that done then Mum took a long look at the mud situation which in Oregon is part and parcel of life. It seems Mum does not like all the mud we have been tracking into the house. Who knew?

You can see the mud patch we have created this past winter. We are creatures of habit, why use the ramp when we can track in mud?

Mum got some pavers to see if she can "re-direct" our paws. Not likely.

Then it was time to take a look at the house.

Definite need for some color, don't you think? Well I told Mum it was not just needed, it was mandatory!

It's a start but I am not sure Mum actually put these plantings together. I suspect Home Depot had a hand in it.

Because of lack of food I have been forced to consume the birdseed that has fallen under the apple tree. What little nutrition I can get from the seed keeps me alive but I cannot last long. (That is a hint for you to send me food and quickly).

This is Cooper. He says he is frozen in disbelief at my claims. I have no idea what the means but ignore it.

Love, Dozer

A Moment of Silence Please...

Someone killed Mr. Platypus

 Was it Cooper? "No" he says.

 Was it Dozer? "No" he says.

"Okay, it might have been me!"

Dear Jed and Abby,

Thank you for writing! We are so behind on the blog it is embarrassing. Hopefully tonight or tomorrow night I will get pictures up and entries made. Work has been so busy that the boys have not gotten on the computer since forever.

Dozer’s leg is pretty much mended, looks like a sprain. No fetch anymore and only tug of war occasionally.

We have been taking long walks each evening – even in the non-stop rain here in Oregon. Both Dozer and Cooper know that right after their dinner we will put on walking vests and be off to the Park or into the car to go find a trail to hike.

Dozer has been taking lots of pictures so his update to the blog will have lots of visual aids.

Thanks for checking on us,
____________________________

Nancy



From: Jed and Abby in MerryLand
Sent: Thursday, April 14, 2011 1:48 AM
To: Nancy Edwards
Subject: [Our Life: Dozer and Coop] New comment on Our Chaotic Life and Yours.


Didn't realize how long it had been since we'd stopped by. How is Dozer's leg?


Re: the Oprah piece - mama thinks the sooner one understands we're all just human and most of us are doing the best we can, the greater the chance of contentment, with occasional bursts of joy and deep dispair - hopefully, more of the former than the later. Some people never figure that out. Sounds like she's doing well to have figured it out by 39. Hope she painted the poor stepson's room - or let him do it.


Jed & Abby