Apparently Mom has a low threshold for destroying toilet paper. It isn't as though we don't have a ton of it. While she was in the shower I took a new roll off the shelf and tore into it. Took a nice big chunk right out of the middle of it and then left hundreds of small pieces all over the bathroom. I found the texture most satisfying, Mom found the whole incident alarmingly messy. I managed to put her off from disciplining me by doing some reverse sneezing and going into my soulful stance. There are fourteen rolls left on the shelf and I hear them call my name.
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